Wednesday's Words: A Case For Sleepover Camps

Last summer, on a lazy and hot - albeit a bit breezy - July (or was it August?)  afternoon, I read a book lying in a hammock. The title of it was Homesick and Happy: How Time Away from Parents Can Help a Child Grow by Michael Thompson. And, being a library book, I jotted down in my one of many little "sparkbooks" bits of sentences of ideas that rang true to me.

Before I begin sharing a few words/quotes/ thoughts that arose from this parenting read, I wish  to ask you a question (which Thompson asks a room full of adults) : What was the sweetest moment of your childhood? Close your eyes. Think about it. Dig deep into your memory. Were your parents present? Were you outside? Were you with friends? Were you facing a challenge or doing something risky?

Now, here are words that struck true to me. Note: these are cut and paste from Thompson.
-Wonderful things can happen for children when they are away from parents.
-Sometimes they [children]  have to get away from us [parents] and experience a little suffering in life, along with a full range of feelings - boredom, anger, giddiness, romance, etc. - to get the hang of it on their own. As long as a parent is standing by watching, the child is going to interpret his or her experiences through the parents' reactions.
-Sleepover camps are one of the last places on earth that are largely electronics free.
-The great genius of camp is the creation of ritual. There are ways of doing things and rules.
-Camp is a place where you discover a skill, and in that process you learn something new about yourself that you could never have learned if you had stayed at home with your mom and dad. And because they weren't there, your achievement belongs to you.
-Camp offers a profound change of pace, a sense of time profoundly different from either school or family. There's down time, nap time, free time. Time slows down and its sense is so vast.
-Enforced rest time with its requirements for quiet or silence gives children time to be with themselves.
-Children's successes belong to them. True self-esteem comes not from praise but from real experiences of skill building and making a contribution to a community.

And, words of advice for parents:
-Give your child the gift of letting him/her go. The reality is that your child is going to have a lot of fun that you cannot see, you cannot photograph, and in which you cannot share. She will rise to challenges, make mistakes, sing and laugh and cry and have a crush on someone you will never meet. You child will return to you changed.
-Take a vacation from parenting, have some fun and don't feel guilty about it! You cannot add value to your child's camp experience by feeling anxious and miserable. Like your child, you need to grow up!
-Enjoy being proud that you have raised a child who can go away, make new friends, learn new skills, and have a good time.

I have been a camper (at a sleepover camp) twice in my teens at Olympia Sports Camp. My brother came with me; hence, the sports camp. The sports I "specialized" in were aqua sports (sailing, kayaking , canoeing and windsurfing) in my first year and tennis in my second.  I was so excited to go! I wanted to attend summer camp for such a long time.  I also experienced summer camp as a counsellor/drama specialist (much later, in my early 20's between my B.Ed and my M.A.) at Walden Camp. I had such a fun summer: living outdoors, being creative, working with kids, socializing with peers.

In the future, I plan to send Margot to sleepover camp for a week or two. I hope to find the strength to allow my little Margot to go and explore and to experience for herself camp-life!